You are always somebody's child

I have written about this before and will again and again. Living multi-generationally has its pluses and its, um, detractions. My twenty-five year old has been heard to wail, on more than one occassion, "I am an adult, I shouldn't have to report where I am going." To the people who are watching her child while she is out "going" wherever it is she is going to.

I do understand. I SOOOOO understand. She was hollering, blindly, over her shoulder at her brother and her grandmother, and probably a parting shot at me. When I leave I am talking to my husband, my son, my mother, my father and my grandson who is frantically pulling on shoes saying, "I come with you 'Bika?" I say, " I am heading to the store, anyone want anything?" and then one of them, inevetably says, "So and so just came from the store, why are you going now?" BECAUSE I WANT TO! My mind screams. My mouth mutters, "Because I forgot to mention the soap and toilet paper we were out of." To shut the men up I usually mention a feminine product. Immediately their eyes go out of focus and you can see hair grow inwards in their ears.

My mother is on loan to me from my sister as we prepare parts of the property for sale, mainly the house. She is an energy dynamo, who also has taken over duties with my father, her ex-husband, with whom I think there is still a good relationship. I say "think" because sometimes I wonder if they are going to kill one another. My mother has taken it upon herself to lay out all of his medication each night. She follows the list that we made. Together we made that list. All three of us. So, all three of us should be able to read it the same, correct? Oh, hell no! I write "one dose" meaning the dose it say on the bottle. She reads it as one tablet . Luckily this only happened one day so we were able to straighten it out pretty promptly. The child proof bottles supposedly aren't a problem since they use tools to pry them off. I guess the VA pharmacy doesn't give a choice on the type of bottle tops.

While they get the bottle tops off and discuss the correct dosages my mother throws out any meds she feels are outdated. The problem being NONE should be since my father is on all prescription meds and they come at the correct time through the mail so what the hell is she throwing away which pisses my father off. Plus, my mother is partially blind. But she's the one reading the meds to see which ones are outdated. One of these days I am going to walk over to my dad's house and find them both dead. Scenario: He killed her and then died from eating the wrong pills or they stabbed each other when trying to open the damn pill bottles with dull paring knives and box cutters. Lucky for me I haven't pissed anyone off in a high office or I might get myself framed for a murder!

The other day I tool ALL the pills away and bought seven pill dispenser, one for each day. I fill them once a week with the correct dosage and give my father his new, corrected list with a picture of the pill and correct dosage to be taking at each interval. Neither of my parents were impressed or happy about this change of events. I didn't discuss it with them, I just did it.

I mean, dammit, I am not a little kid anymore. I am not, I emmit, I emmit! And if I am going to be held responsible at some point by my own siblings for whether or not pills are being taken or our blind mother is wielding sharp objects to open things I have to put my foot down. Over and over and over again, if that's what it takes!